Everyone dreams of the perfect relationship. We all go into each of our relationships knowing there will be times when certain things don't mesh with our own beliefs, morals, what have you. In the early stages of our relationships, we are so blinded by love that we either put up with the differences or we try to change either ourselves or our partner. When it gets to be frustrating, we start questioning our choices.
There is a song by Paula Abdul that was recorded years ago called Opposites Attract. I loved that song, but I always wondered that while they might attract, do they actually last for the long haul?
That's a good question. Opposites attract, but do they last?
Take Sonja for example. Sonja was a successful businesswoman. She put off relationships to further her career and she finally got to a point where she was ready to let someone into her life on an intimate basis. Sonja not only exceeded her limitations in the job success department, she also exceeded in finding out who she was as a person. In a sense, she was a perfect candidate for a mate. She was not only attractive, she had a good job and she knew who she was and wasn't settling for just anyone. She had many "man" friends, but something was always lacking with each of them. She had been hurt in the past, before her climb to success, and she knew what to look for in that perfect mate and wasn't going to make the same mistakes. Not only that, Sonja had a good head on her shoulder and knew everyone wasn't perfect and kept an open mind whenever someone new came into her life.
She didn't have to look long. An old flame came back into her life and while she knew there were obstacles with this person, her feelings started to interfere with her brain. Before long, she was into the relationship at the point where she felt she was losing her identity as a woman who knew what she wanted. She was starting to get frustrated and resentful at all the time she was devoting to this man and it was all because of the "opposites attract" syndrome. What Sonja had in terms of success in any way you look at it, this man went the complete opposite direction. While true love does overcome the differences in some cases, for some, it only escalates the frustration.
It wasn't as if she was being selfish on her part, she was being frustrated at the no calls and contact was sparse with him at times. She knew something was wrong and when your gut instincts tell you that it isn't a normal relationship, something's gotta give. Even though she would tell him that something was frustrating her (and she had every right to do this), it didn't matter. Normal mates will make changes to see what they are doing to cause these pent up frustrations with their loved one if the reasons are understandable.
The thing Sonja needs to understand is that there is always give and take in every relationship but if it adds up to her doing all the work in the romance and other departments, she has a choice. She can either "live" with it and hope he'll change (this often never happens) or give him one more chance and explain her feelings to him and see if he comes around. If it happens over and over, well, it's best Sonja moves on.
So that's it in a nutshell as far as relationships go, but how about from the soul mate perspective?
Keeping in mind that everyone who comes into your life on a "special" level is your soul mate in one aspect or another, how does this guy stack up? Sonja has to realize that he either has come back into her life on a friend (karmic) level, long term relationship (companionship) level or is her long lost twin soul and while the twin souls do meet lots of obstacles more than any other relationship, the only way you can define that is to look on the spiritual level. When someone you are with feels so right and you can almost know what the other is saying without hearing them say it, that's connecting on a spiritual level. With little communication between the two, it doesn't sound like the twin soul to me. It sounds more like the karmic relationship - friends until eternity. I guess time will tell.
I'm curious to know if the special someone in your life enjoys a lot of things that you do or is the complete opposite? Leave a comment to let us know!
May your soul mate dreams come true!
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